Someday We'll Know
by The Fellow Marauder
Summary: Eiri goes back to NY to visit the grave of his fist love, Yuki. He admits that he loves Shuuichi but does not want to. Songfic inspired by the song Someday We'll Know by Jonathan Foreman. R&R!


Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation.

This fic is based on the song, "Someday We'll Know" by Jonathan Foreman (on the 'Walk to Remember' soundtrack). I don't own that, either.

Eiri was back in New York and was driving down the streets. The lights opf the city were illuminating the stars in the sky so they could not be seen unless one looked really hard. Eiri's vision was blured as he was driving down the road. With one swipe of his hand, he wiped away the tears that had collected at the base of his eyes; but the motion appeared to be fruitless for tears still came. They escalated even more as he still went down the street, turning the corner and getting closer to the cemetary where his first love, Yuki, was buried.

_Ninety miles outside Chicago_

_Can't stop driving, I don't know why_

_So many questions need answers_

_Two years later, you're still on my mind._

When Eiri got to the cemetary, he parked his car and got out. Once again wiping the tears from his face, he collected himself before going into it. Walking slowly through the cemetary, his feet followed the usual and known path to his love's grave. Standing in front of it, he looked down. "Hello, Yuki." He said quietly. He then knelt down on the ground in front of the grave and reached out his hand, gently placing his hand on the marble of the tombstone. Once again, he felt tears come to his eyes.

_Whatever happened to Amelia Airhart?_

_Who holds up the stars up in the sky?_

_Is true love just once in a lifetime?_

_Did the captain of the Titanic cry?_

"I... I know I have said this so many times, Yuki. But... I am so sorry. I love you so much, Yuki. I don't want to be without you anymore." He laid down on the ground, laying flat on his stomach in front of Yuki's grave. He wanted to be close to Yuki; he wanted to be back six years and be held in his arms again. "Yuki..." Eiri finally said, after several minutes of silence from him. "Yuki, I feel like I have betrayed you somehow. I... I really think I am in love with Shindou Shuuichi. But I don't want to be." He said, clutching the green grass between his fingers and still sobbing. He was keeping his crying silent as the tears soaked into the ground and the soil. "I want to be in love with you; and only you."

_Someday we'll know if love can move a mountain_

_Someday we'll know why the sky is blue_

_Someday we'll know why I wasn't meant for you_

Eiri then laid with Yuki for several minutes; a half an hour at most. It was then that he got up once again. He sat more with Yuki, looking blankly at his tombstone and thinking about his love. His heart was dropping and he still felt like he was betraying the man he loved. He wanted to be back six years; back when he was with Yuki and happy. Not the way he was now. Kissing the headstone, he stood up. "I love you, Yuki." He said. Turning slowly, he left the cemetary.

_Does anybody know the way to the mountains?_

_Or what the wind says when she cries?_

_I'm speeding by the place that I met you_

_For the ninety-seventh time tonight_

Going back to his car, Eiri opened the door and got back in. He started the ignition once again and took one last look at the cemetary where the love of his life was always going to stay. Feeling more tears come, he forced them away as he roughly wiped away the tears from his face. His lower eyes felt stingy as he wiped them away. He had wiped away so many tears that day, his skin was beginning to get irritated. He placed his forehead down on the steering wheel and waited, breathing deeply and forcing himself to stop crying. "Stop it, Eiri." He growled at himself. "You don't love Shuuichi. You haven't betrayed Yuki. Get ahold of yourself."

_Someday we'll know if love can move a mountain_

_Someday we'll know why the sky is blue_

_Someday we'll know why I wasn't meant for you_

_Someday we'll know why Samson loved Delila_

_One day I'll go dancing on the moon_

_Someday you'll know that I was the one for you_

Eiri left the cemetary and started driving once again down the streets towards his hotel. He could not stop the tears indefinately from falling, but he had forced himself to stop crying for the most part. He felt that something was missing within him. He knew that he loved Yuki but he still felt empty. What was wrong with him that he could not ever feel happy? Was it really so wrong for him to fall for Shuuichi? Eiri, however, would not even think to let himself fall for the Bad Luck singer. He felt that, if he did, he would truly betray Yuki's love and devotion to him. He still did not want to love anyone but Yuki; even if Yuki had been dead for six years.

_I bought a ticket to the end of the rainbow_

_I watched the stars crash in the sea_

_If I could ask God just one question_

_Why aren't you here with me tonight?_

As Eiri reached his hotel, rain started to fall from the sky and splash all over his windshield. Eiri turned on his windshield wipers as he made his way down the street. The rain, as he got closer, only got worse. It got so bad that Eiri could hear a light roar of the rain as it hit the top of the car as he drove. Eiri tried hard to bypass the obstruction of his view and he slowed his car down so he would make sure he would not run over any pedestrians on the street. When he finally got to the hotel, a valet was there to meet him and take his keys. Eiri handed the keys to him and then stepped onto the carpet of the hotel, going inside it and just wanting to get some sleep. After seeing Yuki once again, he was beat and was depressed. All he wanted was to stay alone in his hotel room, drink some beer and go to bed. But other things were happening that prevented Eiri to do what he wanted.

"I'm sorry. I told you, I can not tell you where Yuki Eiri is staying." At the mention of his name, Eiri alerted his ears and looked up, facing the desk to see who was looking for him. He froze.

"Please," Shuuichi pleaded. "I really need to see him. I know he is not expecting me, but this is important."

The receptionist smirked, laughing at his childish behavior. "You really do not understand. Unless you are the police, we have no obligation to tell you where Yuki Eiri is. Our residents have a right to have their privacy respected."

"But this is important."

"I'm sorry."

"It's no trouble."

"Yuki!" Shuuichi exclaimed, taken aback at Eiri's sudden appearance. Eiri himself did not know what he was doing before he was standing next to Shuuichi and doing it. It was like someone was taking over his body and making him do the things he was.

"Come on, Shuuichi." He said to his lover in Japanese; the woman receptionist did not understand what he had said. "Let's go upstairs." He came with Eiri and still looked confused. Once they got in the elevator, Eiri turned to his lover and shoved him gently against the wall of the elevator, after the doors had closed and swallowed them up.

"Yu-- Yuki..." Shuuichi said, flustered. Eiri ignored Shuuichi's objections and kissed him.

_Someday we'll know if love can move a mountain_

_Someday we'll know why the sky is blue_

_Someday we'll know why I wasn't meant for you_

_Someday we'll know why Samson loved Delila_

_One day I'll go dancing on the moon_

_Someday you'll know that I was the one for you_

/Please forgive me, Yuki./ Eiri thought to himself as he kissed Shuuichi and let his hands explore his lovers' chest. Shuuichi returned the affections and licked Eiri's tongue through their kiss. /I don't want to be in love Shuuichi... but I am. I love him so much./

TBC.

-- I know that this story is based in NYC, but the song says Chicago; I did not want to ruin the words of the song. Gomen ne. PLEASE REVIEW!!!--


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